You’ve found yourself at the end of another issue of Oddballs. Que the song “The End” by the Doors. Go on, do it!
Your questions and comments addressed by none other than our resident Odditer…
Seamus C. Monster
Full disclosure: The questions and comments at hand are completely fictional as of this moment. So… send us questions and comments, will ya?
Full disclosure: The questions and comments at hand are completely fictional as of this moment. So… send us questions and comments, will ya?
Dear Oddballs,
I’m 23. How long should I wait to have kids? Oh, I’m a guy, BTW.
Bachelor in Beaumont, TX
Dear Bachelor,
As a guy, you’ll have to wait until science comes up with a way for males to carry children in their womb, not unlike the movie “Junior.”
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
Which bird would you be if you were a bird? I think I would be a penguin because of my gait.
Fowl Human in Fayetteville, NC
Dear Fowl Human,
That’s easy. I would be Admiral Richard Bird. That way I could go back to our hallow Earth. They kicked me out of there when, coincidentally, I tried to capture one of the giant penguins to eat. Thems are good eatin’!
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
Sometimes, when I focus intently on one letter on my computer keyboard, the letters on the adjacent keys disappear. When I notice, they magically reappear. What gives?
Side Eyes in Schenectady, NY
Dear Side Eyes,
What you’re experiencing is called “Lazy Brain Eye.” Your brain doesn’t think you need to have that information so it deletes it from your memory cache. I know this because someone said it in the movie “My Ventriloquist Monkey Dummy & Me.” Duh!
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
Since you won’t release issues 1-3, will you make new ones please?
FOMO in Farmington, NM
Dear FOMO,
Maybe. Time will tell.
Seamus C. Monster
Send questions and comments to jason.salas1@gmail.com or DM them on Instagram @OddballsZine
Jason Salas 