Below is the text for easy readin’!
Your questions and comments addressed by none other than our resident Odditer… Seamus C. Monster.
Full disclosure: The questions and comments at hand are completely fictional as of this moment. So… send us questions and comments, will ya?
Dear Oddballs,
Times have changed. Guys used to be able to walk up to women and ask them out but the culture frowns on that now. How do I ask a woman out without actually having to ask her out?
Lonely Guy in WY
Dear No Game,
Go to the grocery store and ask a nice single woman, “How do you make guacamole?” She’ll want to teach you how to make guacamole. Even if it doesn’t work out, you’ll have some guacamole but I have a feeling you’ll get the guacamole and the girl!
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
How can I make a million dollars?
Broke in ID
Dear Broke,
I’ve heard it said, “It’s not how much you make, but how much you save.” So, it’s easy… simply save a million dollars.
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
I’d like to get a digital copy of your zine but I don’t have 99¢.
Even Broker in AL
Dear Even Broker,
I would gift the digital copy but I can’t afford the postage.
Seamus C. Monster
Dear Oddballs,
Men used to walk up to ladies and ask them out but now that doesn’t happen so much. How do I find a good man to date me?
Lonely Lady in WY
Dear Snotty,
Go to the store and wait for a guy to ask you how to make guacamole then tell him you’ll show him how to make the guacamole. It might be good to practice how to make guacamole before offering to teach him how to make it. If you need a good recipe for guacamole, I’ll print one in an upcoming issue. Good luck!
Seamus C. Monster
Send questions and comments to jason.salas1@gmail.com or DM them on Instagram @OddballsZine
Jason Salas 