The Daily Times: Remarry

On a personal note, I am remarried; second marriage. Every relationship, of course, is different. But I believe that divorce is never a good thing.

Some may say, “Well, what if the person is in an abusive marriage?” or the like. That’s not necessarily a defense of divorce (although I that may be a solution), but rather, a symptom of a bad choice in a mate or poor lifestyle choices or communication in the relationship.

Some may now retort, “People change! What if the person you marry became someone completely different!” Perhaps. But a leopard doesn’t change its spots. It may be harsh to hear, but we, as a culture, have abandoned the extreme vetting process of finding a suitable spouse (or trying to be one). I venture to guess that well over half of us are guilty of such.

On another note, divorce can wreak havoc on one’s confidence and outlook on love. Some overcompensate in the attempt at being the opposite of the crappy spouse they once were (that’s me), while others don’t change and get into similar relationships, and still others give up or fail (Mr. Jackovich above can attest to that). There has to be a healthy way of healing, but it’s like trying to solve a math equation with too many variables.

On a lighter note, there is love out there in the world. Yes, many of us are broken, but we can mend. And, what better yet, we can find someone with whom we can mend with and bond tightly together in the process.

The Daily Times: Mondays

Oh, those dreaded Mondays!

I read a book once about Mondays and dreading work. At the time, it was called “48 Hours to the Work You Love.” It’s now called “No More Dreaded Mondays” or maybe even “No More Mondays.”

Ironically, it’s hard work to get to the don’t-have-to-work phase of life. And it doesn’t happen by accident.

I no longer dread Mondays. They’re not my favorite, but if every day was my favorite, I would have no favorite. That’s how favorites work. My favorite day is Saturday because it’s open and I can spend time with my family. It’s also my cheat day so that only adds to the flavor, no pun intended.

The thing about hating Mondays is that it is so trite; low-hanging fruit. There’s also a negative energy in hating/focusing on one day vs. the positive energy/focusing on a favorite day. I chose the latter.

By the way, I’m writing this on a Saturday.

The Daily Times: Have to Work

Cal has a laid-back, carefree disposition. I’m sure you have met people like that.

Yet, too often we mistake a disposition for a personality trait. If we dig deeper, we’ll most likely find that those who come across as laid-back and carefree have achieved that disposition – that accomplishment – through the diligent design of their lifestyle.

Cal realized, early on, that it would be better to be a free-agent than to be an employee. He set out on that track and eventually achieved that level. Such achievements (and, more importantly, the work and sacrifice one endures to get there) build confidence.

This is the core of Cal’s confidence.